City Lights

(Took these from the Prince David roof deck where we had our PMSA Turnover Party. I will really miss Katipunan :( I don't ever wanna leave.)

Here in these deep city lights

Girl could get lost tonight

I'm finding every reason to be gone

Nothing here to hold on to

Could I hold on to you?

On sappiness and happy endings..

Because I haven't seen this face in what seems like forever. It's sort of obligatory for me to put his annoying face here. Haha! I missed you, Jaime! Welcome back!

I feel really lucky that I was able to meet people in college that I'm sure I will be friends with until we're all aged and grey. Elysa's one of them!

Being the resident 3rd wheel that I am. I will always be rooting for this couple though! Elysa <3 Migo

Kiara, Ruth and Jaime (being all creepy looking). It was so fun being with them these 4 years! It was fun being with them at the Research Conference where some of my closest college buddies were nominated as finalists for Best Thesis!

Brick-breaker and Fruit Ninja. Nice going you guys! =))

Jaime's Pasalubong! He brought us different flavored KitKats! I only got to taste this Wasabi one..I thought it was weird at first but it was actually really good. I wanted to taste the other flavors too, got a bite of the Cherry Blossom one, but then I got shy and well..sweets make me thirsty and I was too lazy to stand up and get water. Thanks for this, Jaime!

The 3 very desrving Best Thesis winners with their adviser and Dr. Teh! We all got teary-eyed because they really weren't expecting anything, you could see it in their faces when their names were announced. So humble and unassuming, these 3 have come a long way from our first year days..we all have. Hay! Y1 represent!!!

Y1!!! So very proud to be part of this block! Will miss every single one of you, crazies!

KREM!!! Wouldn't know where I'd be now if not for these 3 very awesome girls!

Psych 2012! A group of very genuine and seriously gifted individuals :) Nice to have crossed paths with you all!

 And I also kind of said goodbye to the PMSA EB 2011-2012 yesterday at the Turnover! I will really miss all of these dedicated people. It has been really fun working with you!

It hasn't sunk in yet but the end is slowly dawning on me. I know that nostalgia will hit me soon enough. "We're all right where we're supposed to be." and for the past four years, despite the challenges, I have always been home in the Ateneo and I have always been family with everyone I met here. Cheers to us! Batch 2012's gonna rock the world!!!

I Can't Make You Love Me

Two of my most favorite artists covered Bonnie Raitt's I Can't Make You Love Me and I love both their covers. I guess they both come from a similar point of view so you'll see how genuine their each of their versions are. Heartache is heartache after all. So I decided to do my own since I kind of share the same sentiments as these two lovely but broken artists who, despite everything are still open to love. Here's my very very very rough one take session on Bonnie Raitt's I Can't Make You Love Me recorded in the bathroom at almost 1AM.

I Can't Make You Love Me (Cover)

In the end, no matter what heartache I will go through, I know in my heart that music will always save me.

Birthday Blues

Dear 21 year old self,

See you in a few! I hope you will always remember to be kind and to never let anything harden your heart. Love yourself more and all else will follow. Allow yourself to be happy, okay? Trust me, you deserve it.

Sincerely,

Your 20 year old self

It's my party and I'll cry if I want to.

(A couple of self-portraits from my "Advance Birthday Weekend" as an ode to my almost 21 year old, issue-infested self. You know what they say, your 20s are your selfish years and I'm a testament to that.)

1:47 AM

Today was all sorts of hell for me. I went home defeated. Unfortunately, things still had to get done so I couldn't really retreat under the covers just yet. I don't think I'll be able to until after graduation. We're almost there but at the same time, it feels like I'm just dragging my feet. Where is my heart? Where is my head? These are the questions. What I know is, they're nowhere near me now. Either, my head is too high up in the clouds or my heart is still under construction. I have to find them soon. I have to find myself soon. I'm too lost to even think about stepping into a much more complicated reality than the one I'm currently in. I'm afraid that if I do, I might end up losing myself completely.

On a lighter, less tragic note..I do know that I'm still very blessed, especially with the people around me who never fail to show me the light and the good. As a very good example, my Ate brought me home a large Purple Potato Latte from Subspace Coffee (new favorite). The drink ended up as my dinner (what diet). I love my Ate! And I love random things like this that make me look at life and say, "Challenge Accepted!" Quality people make life worth it and I'm happy to say, I know plenty.

Why is it that I find myself blogging at the weirdest of hours..apparently I've acquired a nocturnal lifestyle without even knowing it (no thank you, school stress). Anyway I really hope I can post something of value here soon. I have so many in mind, so many plans. All I need is to follow through. To be honest, I've always kind of struggled with that.

TTYL,
Mercemarie

Unfinished Business

Forever is a long long time, have you lost your way??

Just one of those days...

I can be whoever you want me to be...

On making people happy and being temporary...

I live on several golden rules, mantras and mottos. But if I sum up all of them, they all pertain to one thing: HAPPINESS. I believe that what will ultimately make me happy in the end is to make other people happy, most especially the ones that I love. Happiness is a struggle, it really is. To be able to take joy from the simplest of things, that is true victory.

(Photos taken last January 28, 2012 when we surprised my bestfriend for her 21st! You're old but I love you! HAHA)